Chapter Four- Holy Moments in Pain

Chapter Four- Holy moments in pain

Maybe you’re thinking that all this holy moment stuff sounds great, but it’s too late for me. I’ve been hurt too much or experienced loss too many times to risk my heart again and engage God in this way. After all, I trusted Him with (you fill in the blank) and now they’re gone, it’s broken, the family is a mess, my kids are lost in self-destructive behavior, and now my health is in decline. How do we look for and ask for holy moments when life has kicked us in the teeth, and it feels like God is just watching it all happen. Believe me, most of us will come to this place of intersection in our journey if we live long enough, love hard enough, and live around broken people. Come with me in this chapter to meet some holy moment people and hear their thoughts on loss and pain from perhaps a different perspective than you’ve heard before.

Time does NOT heal all wounds. The same date rolls around every year. One of mine is July 10. That’s when my dad gained heaven and I lost one of my life anchors. Each year on this date I call my family and solemnly celebrate his memory. We talk about God’s goodness for the years we had with him, and we celebrate the legacy of love he left with us in our extended family. For all of us, the painful memories of loss resurface at the slightest stimulation from the right person or situation. To pretend the pain is gone, or to mask it with activities and busyness is a disservice to the moment and people who were part of that painful event. Loss is loss, and you can’t easily replace a loss with something else. Life this side of heaven is hard. We live with the broken things that happen to us from the time we are children until the day we leave this broken world. We never quite realize the trauma and pain we have soaked up, so we find ways to cope. Some of those ways lead us to God and His comfort, other ways lead us away from God into darker, more self-destructive ways of coping. These are the pathways that promise temporary relief but only cause more pain.

So how can I ever see a holy moment or be a holy moment to others when I am lost in all my own pain and suffering? Just ask God to show you a holy moment, then be on the lookout. Ask God to meet you in your pain and trust him (that may be hard) to bring you holy moments every day. Here is an example of how that happens.

Anita sees hearts. She sees them in leaves, in art, in the sky, in the shells at the beach, everywhere. She started seeing hearts after the loss of her grandson to a brain tumor when he was four years old. It was a long, hard fight, and it broke her heart to see his light diminish and then go out this side of heaven at so early an age. She knows he is now in the presence of Jesus, healed and happy. She knows she will see him when it is her turn to make the transition from here to heaven. She knows the truth, but her heart aches every day with the loss and memory of the sweet boy he was, and the pain he suffered. How does Anita still experience holy moments? She chooses to see them in the midst of her pain. Every time she sees a heart it reminds her of the love God has for her grandson and the love Jesus has for her, right in the middle of her pain. Jesus didn’t promise Anita He would make the pain go away, He promised to be with her in the pain. Sometimes the sting of loss lessens with time, but the scar left by the loss remains, and it can be touched and felt for the rest of our time this side of heaven. Loss is loss, something we have is gone and it can’t be replaced. Depending on our emotional health, some people can deal with the loss and move on with a sense of renewed hope and trust in God. Sometimes it takes years to recover and find the light again. No matter where your experience is along that line, God has not moved. He was there when it happened, is there now and will be there with you everyday. That’s why he came to live with us in this broken, pain filled world. The writer of Hebrews puts it well in chapter 2:17-18.

Therefore, he had to be made like his brothers in every respect, so that he might become a merciful and faithful high priest in the service of God, to make propitiation for the sins of the people. For because he himself has suffered when tempted, he is able to help those who are being tempted.

Jesus experienced loss, betrayal, hunger, pain, imperfect relationships, and death. He did this so we would be comforted by the fact that our God knows our pain and is with us in our pain. 

As a modern marketing project about Jesus says, “He gets us.”

Later in Hebrews in chapter 4:14-16 He writes.

Since then, we have a great high priest who has passed through the heavens, Jesus, the Son of God, let us hold fast our confession. For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weaknesses, but one who in every respect has been tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.

You are never alone in your suffering, your anxiety, your loss, your pain. Allow the pain and loss   to draw you into the presence of the one who loves you dearly, suffered like you, and promises to strengthen and empower you so you can endure and stand strong in the midst of it all.

Qualified to be a holy moment to people in pain

When you learn the freedom of surrendering your pain to Jesus, you can become a holy moment to another person suffering in the same way you have suffered. You know the pain  they feel, the loss that they carry, and the hope they are looking for. You are qualified through your suffering to be a holy moment to them at their time of need. Paul said it best in his second letter to the church at Corinth. 2 Corinthians 1:3-6.

“Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. For as we share abundantly in Christ's sufferings, so through Christ we share abundantly in comfort too.”

It sounds counterinitiative but when you reach out to comfort or serve others who have suffered like you, your pain becomes less, and your heart is healed a little in that holy moment. Ask God to show you a person you can connect with or a place you can serve at where people have suffered like you and need a holy moment. I assure you it will become a blessing to you both.

 You can also experience your own holy moments as you bring your pain and loss to Jesus anytime you need to. He doesn’t get frustrated or tired of your coming to Him, He delights in it. You may need your own holy moment many times a day to start. It may be something like “Lord help me get out of this bed today” or “Jesus show me a holy moment today that tells me I am not alone in this suffering”. Whatever you want to ask Jesus or tell Jesus, do it right now. He is already listening as His spirit is dwelling in you, always interceding to the Father on your behalf. (Romans 8:26-27)  In time, you may find yourself asking God to make you a holy moment to the others suffering around you. Walking with others through the pain is part of the healing process, but you must experience a measure of personal healing first, or you will bring bitterness and hopelessness to them instead of peace and strength.

Resist isolation as it may become a way the enemy can drown you in a pool of self-pity and self-suffering, emphasis on self. There are times to suffer alone with God, but never alone with just your painful thoughts. Take the time you need to get up off the floor to a sitting position. That may take weeks. Then take more time to stand in Jesus’ strength. That may take months or longer.  Walk as you are able, engage with people again as you feel able, but allow the spirit to bless you with personal holy moments of love and mercy and grace. In the midst of the loss, ask Jesus to make you a holy moment to those around you who may need you. It is in your weakness Jesus shows up the most. You will never know the eternal impact you may have on somebody in the midst of your suffering. People are always watching us, and they will recognize the holiness of God around your brokenness if you are surrendering the brokenness to Jesus daily, or maybe even hourly.

I suffered from Lyme’s disease for years as I went undiagnosed. It nearly killed me. I stumbled into the only Lyme disease doctor in the area, and I knew I had finally found a doctor who would give me the medicine I needed. I entered a two-year time of medication, healing and recovery. Somebody at my church came to me and told me that their faith was strengthened as they watched me suffer well during those two years. I personally didn’t think I suffered well, but obviously I surrendered it to Jesus enough that His presence shone through my pain. I was a holy moment and didn’t even know it!

Remember, it is not about how strong you can be, it is about the presence of God accomplishing the purpose of God for the glory of God and the benefit of those suffering around you. 

Use the suffering of this world to inspire you to look for more holy moments

I attended the memorial service of a wrestling partner from college days. Charlie Quaile was a delight to work out with. He always pushed me in practice and encouraged me in my faith. He raised five children and celebrated several grandchildren before a massive, unexpected heart attack took him to eternity. I hadn’t seen Charlie in over 40 years when I moved to PA after working with FCA. The service was a celebration of Charlie’s faithfulness to his family and his Savior. I got to reconnect with other wrestling teammates I hadn’t seen for 40 years as well. The result was a holy moment where we remembered God’s goodness to us in those years. The service lit a fire under me to not lose connection with these men again. Some of them looked worn out from life’s struggles, while others looked to be thriving in their faith and life. I am now developing some new relationships with these alumni in order to encourage each other in our walks with God and our families. Holy moments are popping up all over as I respond to the spirit’s invitation to them.

People are suffering all around us. Some people are enduring physical ailments they don’t want people to know about. Others quietly medicate in one way or another just to get through the day. Others thrash about in anger and destructive language designed to push people away and further isolate them in their pain. I have been asking God to direct me to hurting people who I am qualified to help. Let’s look at 2 Corinthians 1: 3-5 again. It is a pivotal teaching for those in pain.

“Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. For as we share abundantly in Christ's sufferings, so through Christ we share abundantly in comfort too.”

My suffering qualifies me to comfort others who have suffered in the same way. I am offended when somebody tells me they know just how I feel when I know they have never gone through this pain themselves. On the other hand, I am comforted when a friend tells me their own story of similar sufferings and how God got them through. That friend is a true comfort to be sure. The message here is to look upon your own sufferings in this life as qualifiers for holy moments that people will need from you in the future. This side of heaven there will be loss for sure, but there is also a future purpose as you bring comfort and healing to others only you can bring. This will be a true holy moment. Don’t allow the enemy to keep you in that isolated pool of despair. But just as important, don’t try to forget the pain that the loss caused, as that would be equally unhealthy. Take the pain to Jesus and look for others who need the holy moment only you can provide.

Her name is Nan. She attended my weekly bible study. She is a size 0 dress size with a size 10 heart. She came alive to Jesus later in her life but has made up the time with the people she blesses. Nan is a holy moment machine. She looks for ways to encourage, challenge, instruct and bless people no matter what setting she’s in. If she’s in line at the grocery store, she’s praying with the lady behind her when she overhears the lady on a stressful phone call. She asks the checkout person how she is, and when she gets a hesitant answer, she blesses her with encouraging words. When people come to her house to service her machines, she thanks them for their time, even if it takes longer than expected. Nan is always looking for the holy moment, she is always listening for the holy moment, and she is always anticipating a holy moment opportunity. This is what it means to be alive in Christ, led by His spirit in you, calibrating your heart and tuning to the truth station in you so you can partner with Jesus in bringing light, love, and life to the broken world around you.

Did I mention that Nan is in pain most days? Various skeletal issues can sometimes bring her severe, almost paralyzing pain. In her physical distress, Nan still chooses to become a holy moment to whoever is around her. This spiritual strength despite her physical weakness is a witness to those she blesses. Nan realizes that it is God who has created her to do good things He has prepared ahead of her to do. What is her secret? Nan is looking for the holy moments, and God shows them to her. Nan asks God to make her a holy moment, and He does. I look forward to running in heaven with Nan through the fields of people she has blessed so I can hear the holy moment stories they will share.

Our past pain can be used for His Holy moments today

Stephanie spent the first ten years of her life enduring emotional and mental pain from others. Then she spent the next ten years finding ways to escape or numb the pain. The result was that at age twenty, she was already into two of the four abortions she would experience because of her self-medicating self-abusing lifestyle. Stephanie is a beautiful person created in God’s image with eternal worth. Satan used her pain to lead her to more pain. The enemy is most happy when the image bearers of God abuse the beautiful creation they were designed to become. 

Stephanie found some Christ followers who were different from the church going people who abused her when she was young. She learned of Jesus’ great love for her and came to understand how He could give her a new heart and a new soul, one that was cleansed and restored back to His initial intentions. Once she was stable enough, she began to pour her energies into rescuing others from abuse and abortion. Stephanie is not doing this as a penance to make up for the four abortions she had. She’s serving because Jesus made her whole and clean, and she wants to share that with others. In the pain of life, we all choose whether to get better or bitter. Once Stephanie was redeemed by her creator, she had the capacity to get better, and was empowered to give and receive love and trust again. It took time to surrender the bitterness and shame that the enemy had offered her, but she will tell you every day is a new day to know God better and serve just one person more. Stephanie is a holy moment more that even she knows. God is showing up every day in her life as people come to hear the hope that is in her.

Holy moments in silence

Sometimes you become a holy moment when you just sit with someone in their pain and loss. 

This is hard to do unless you have experienced this level of pain and loss. I remember inviting a friend over so I could unload on him about my life, the people who had betrayed me, the isolation I felt, and the commitment I was making to write people off and never trust or love again. I don’t know what I expected him to do, as none of my suffering was a result of him. He was a friend I felt I could trust to share my most raw moments with. After ten minutes of raving, yelling, cursing, and screaming into the air I collapsed on the sofa next to him. He didn’t say a word. In fact, so much time passed I was wondering if he was alright. I feared my tantrum had shocked him into revulsion and distain for me. Then he turned to me with a tear in his eye and said “feel better? Got any more?” That was all I needed. I launched into another tirade on the foibles of my friends, the unrealistic demands of my colleagues, and the hopelessness of my situation. I plopped down on the sofa again, certain this would move him to attack me with bible verses and positive statements that I was ready to argue over. He didn’t. He just sat there, looking down at his feet, then he looked up at me. “Brother, I love you, and my heart breaks over the pain you are in. I’m here as long as you need me to be.” That was it. No condemnation for my lack of faith, no bible verse attack, no quotes from leading scholars on how I can make this better in three easy steps. Just the simple statement God used as a holy moment for me. “I’m here as long as you need me to be.”

We sat there in silence, but the spiritual world around us was not silent. God was coming to my rescue, armed with love, truth, forgiveness, and hope. As he prayed silently, I began to open up to God’s presence. As I relinquished my hold on my pain, Jesus removed the bitter thorn the enemy had placed in my heart. In time, I could speak again. We spent another couple of hours there, me making statements and him listening. It was a holy moment worth remembering. It saved my life at the time, which the enemy was set on destroying.

I have had the opportunity to be that silent partner to people over the past 40 years. I have learned to be quiet and speak only short sentences as God leads. I have watched God work in mighty ways in the silence of the moment. People in pain don’t need your witty thoughts as much as they need you, just you, present, in the moment, with them. This is a most holy moment you may be invited to by the people who know you best and will trust you with their pain. Cherish the invitation and be quiet in the holy moment.

One more Holy moment in your pain

We have all lost things and people we love. We will lose more things and people we love as we go through life. Loss can leave an empty space in our soul. We can fill it with something or someone else or invite Jesus there. Part of the healing comes when we learn to sit with the loss but not be consumed by it.

Jesus sits with us in our loss and invites us to experience holy moments in the midst of the loss. It may come in the shape of a heart in a leaf, or a song that you listened to that brings tears of healing. It may come as a shared memory with family, or a story of a loved one now with God in heaven. Each of these are holy moments offered by your Savior who desires to bring ongoing healing and wholeness to you with each holy moment He brings.

Holy moments bring personal healing and position us to eventually bring healing to others. Surrender is once again the key here. This means that we admit that God knows it all, controls it all and uses it all for His perfect plan and glory.

This surrender will seem foreign at first as we struggle with feelings of anger, betrayal, loss and emptiness. It’s ok, God can handle all your emotions, that’s why he came to live in you. He will stay close to you in every phase of your brokenness. You are never alone. You can kick and scream in the pain, but you can never kick Jesus away. 

I’m reminded of a verse I struggled with for years. 2 Timothy 2:11-13

The saying is trustworthy, for If we have died with him, we will also live with him;

if we endure, we will also reign with him; if we deny him, he also will deny us;

if we are faithless, he remains faithful, for he cannot deny himself.

I now understand that the part that denying has to do with a person who is denying Jesus and refusing His salvation and forgiveness. That isn’t me. Then there is the part that talks about my faithlessness and His faithfulness. My suffering has sometimes brought me to a crisis of faith. I wondered if all of this was true, If God really cared about my pain and loss, and if He did why hadn’t He intervened. In the midst of my temporary faithlessness Jesus remained faithful to me with His presence in me through His Spirit of regeneration and renewal. There was no way I was going to lose Jesus, no matter how bad it got.

Somebody wrote a story about walking with Jesus in a dream and seeing a pair of footprints in the sand as they walked with Jesus at the ocean. When they looked back over the trail, they could see times where there were only one pair of footprints. “Jesus” the exclaimed, “You promised to always be with me and never abandon me, but I see places where there is only one pair of footprints in the sand. What happened?” “Dear Child” Jesus responded, “The moments in your life where you see only one pair of footprints were the times I carried you through the pain and loss you could not endure.”

Wow, what a beautiful picture of the verse I shared. This is the hope we have in Jesus this side of Heaven. There is no suffering you will experience that your suffering savior cannot get you through or if needed carry you through.

Walking with others who have suffered loss helps. It allows God to be a holy moment through us and positions us to be holy moments for others. There is a powerful inner healing that happens when a Christ follower allows the holy spirit to flow out of them and impact the person they are comforting. It is a mystery to me, but I have experienced it and seen it in others. This is the power of the holy moment in pain. Jesus moves through you and leaves a strong sense of inner peace and strength.   Seek out a faith-based grief group or commit to walk through your pain with a trusted friend who will sit with you, walk with you, cry with you, mourn with you, and be Jesus to you in your pain.

Now you are beginning to understand the power of being in the holy moment. It is all about Jesus in you, the hope of the world. Don’t push Him away in your loss. Don’t blame Him for the loss. Sin is the cause for brokenness, pain and loss this side of Heaven, never God. God uses the pain of loss to open our eyes to our hopeless condition this side of heaven. Satan uses loss to crush us and invite us to self-abuse, bitterness, regret, shame, anger, and more. Jesus reminds us in John 16:33-

“I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.”

Choose Jesus in your pain and loss. Surrender to His presence and love. Bring your pain and loss to the cross. Ponder for a moment the pain and loss Jesus went through to be with you and live in you. Take the time needed to heal, but don’t fall into the pit of despair and bitterness. Receive the strength and healing Jesus offers you at the cross. Leave the pain and loss there and walk away renewed, hopeful, and at peace with your maker. Commit to seeing and being a holy moment where you can, empowered by His spirit, healed by His presence.

Remembering God has and will always be there.

God has a good memory. He created time and space and has no limits on His ability to create and recreate matter, time, and physical processes. All through scripture we read about how God remembered His covenant with His creation. He commands his creation to remember Him and His commands.

The Old Testament people were commanded to recall holy moments all the time. God commanded days of remembrance for historic moments where God stepped in to save, discipline, punish or embrace His creation. When something monumental happened to the people, it was marked down on their collective calendar and a holy day of observance was scheduled. God commanded the priests to take parts of the Torah and place them in small boxes that were bound to their foreheads for all to see.

Numbers 15:36- 16:2 describes this process for memory making.

The LORD said to Moses, “Speak to the people of Israel, and tell them to make tassels on the corners of their garments throughout their generations, and to put a cord of blue on the tassel of each corner. And it shall be a tassel for you to look at and remember all the commandments of the LORD, to do them, not to follow after your own heart and your own eyes, which you are inclined to whore after. So you shall remember and do all my commandments, and be holy to your God. I am the LORD your God, who brought you out of the land of Egypt to be your God: I am the LORD your God.

Exodus 13:8-10 calls the father to use these reminders to preach to his family.

 “It shall be for a sign unto thee upon thine hand, etc. the phylacteries of the Pharisees—parchment scrolls, which were worn on their wrists and foreheads

that the Lord's law may be in thy mouth, etc.—that is, that it may be the subject of frequent conversation and familiar knowledge among the people.”

Mothers, fathers, tell your sons and daughters. Wear the word and have it in your mouth to share.

Telling others about the truth of God helps us remember His faithfulness to us. Telling others reminds us of truths we can sometimes forget. Telling others reminds us of God’s provision we had in the past as we struggle with provision now.

When the people of God were wandering in the dessert, trusting God to bring them to the promised land, they would build stone monuments, sometimes just a pile of stones to commemorate and mark the holy moment where God showed up and their lives were changed. Do you believe that God still shows up for His people? For you??  Can you remember the times He did show up in your life and the people around you? Can you go back and experience the emotions and images of that holy moment? Yes, that was a holy moment. It was a time when God’s presence achieved God’s purpose for God’s glory and your benefit. I call these ‘But God’ moments. Your memory may begin with;

“We were certain this was the last time, we were sure it was all over, but God…….”

“The landlord told us to be out next week. We could not see a way to stay but God…..”

“The doctor said it was cancer, stage 4. But God…….

“The company said they were downsizing; we had no other option but God……”

The “But God” moments in our lives point to the supernatural presence, protection, provision and purpose God provides in our most challenging, dark, hopeless moments. A person who has surrendered their life to Jesus does not give up every time life brings brokenness and pain. Choosing to remember a holy moment in the painful times of life allows the spirit of God to operate in a manner that frees God to shower His love and blessings over you. The hard part is choosing to see the holy moments. When we are betrayed, let down, deceived, forsaken, rejected, played for a fool, we often respond in self-protective ways to ensure we never experience that kind of pain again. We also wonder privately where God was during this pain. The potential here is that with every new pain we build a wall of self-protection until years later we are emotionally safe but separated and isolated, right where the enemy of our souls wants us. We can still function in the day-to-day world, but something has died in us, and we begin to lose hope in people, the world, even God himself. Jesus made two promises in John 16:33.

“I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.”

The things Jesus refers to are the many statements made in chapters 15 and 16. Jesus was preparing his inner circle for the hard times they are going to face over the coming weeks. As He speaks to them, He speaks to us today who call ourselves followers of Jesus.

Promise one- In this world you will have tribulation. There it is the good news of Jesus Christ! Sorry, I don’t mean to be flippant. So much of modern Christianity was built on the promise of success, power, healings, overcoming, wealth, and freedom from pain. Who wouldn’t want to have that kind of life? While many people have succeeded in applying the word of faith principles to their lives, they managed to succeed despite Jesus. They missed the bigger truth Jesus was teaching here. Yes, Jesus did come to give us life abundant, yes Jesus gives us the power through His spirit in us to live a life of abundance and overcoming. Yes, Jesus opens the door to new life with Him as we learn His word, obey it daily, and entrust everything to him. The problem is we sometimes confuse our success with God’s blessings. We begin to fall for the lie that if we live a holy life, separated from sin, obedient to Jesus, surrendered to His will for us, everything will work out the way we have planned it. We are told we can speak things into existence if we have the faith. We hear stories of people who were miraculously healed or made wealthy when they claimed a set of verses for their lives. We are challenged to apply the same formula to our lives so we can have the same experience others have had. We are unintentionally entering into a transactional relationship with Jesus when He desires a transformational relationship. When the healing doesn’t happen, or the unemployment continues, or the broken relationship stays broken, we demand our money back.  Then we run into this verse.

“I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.”

In this world you WILL have tribulation, let downs, sickness, death, accidents, attacks, rejections and more. Jesus came to the earth to experience the brokenness of man so He could abide with us in the brokenness when it happens to us. The book of Hebrews tells us Jesus became like us so He could die for us and then live for us as a high priest who knows what we were dealing with. He’s been where we’ve been so He can be our empathetic high priest.

Promise two- Be of good cheer; I have overcome the world.

This is what leads to the “But God” moments in our lives. These are the holy moments when God did show up, showed mercy and grace, averted a disaster, did a just in the nick of time miracle that was journal worthy. Come on, I know you can come up with one of these past history holy moments. Think back to an event where God’s presence achieved God’s purpose for God’s glory and your benefit. It may be just today, when that car that was barreling towards you and your family finally swerved and missed you. Maybe it was a moment when you were shown mercy or grace by a family member or customer service person. It could have been a song that warmed your heart and drew you into Jesus’ presence. It could be the call that the cancer was in remission, or the house was going to sell, or the sale that you hoped for actually happened. Whatever the memory, I’m sure you can recall one time God was there for you. Now, step back, acknowledge Jesus in that moment, and allow Him to bring you that faith, relief, joy, peace, and happiness into the moment you are in right now. You just created a Holy Moment memorial.

I prefer to store these moments in my digital journal., Ten years ago I committed to share my life moments and pictures with my family as a gift to them when I pass. I have written about my happy days, my sad days, my boring days, and my celebration days. I have stored thousands of pictures and videos for them to see.  I have recorded many holy moment memorials in that journal, and I return to those regularly when I feel the need to relive those moments. God uses these holy moment memorials to remind me how blessed I am, how cherished I am, and how sovereign God is in my life. This past year was a year of loss and uncertainty. I returned to some beautiful holt moment memorials, and those memorials to God’s goodness provided the renewed faith I needed in order to persevere where I would normally would have  given up hope.

The year I am writing this final version I am calling the year of healing. After losing my business in 2013, I spent ten years experiencing loss in every area of my life. God had me on a journey of healing I didn’t want to be on. Through those years I learned deep lessons of trust, surrender, and humility as I experienced the severe mercy of God. In 2023 God caused several good things to happen. My son came home to us free from addiction with a renewed commitment to knowing and following Jesus. My daughter pulled a feeding tube out of her that had been there for over four years. My wife had hernia surgery that relieved the pain she had suffered with for over four years. I had been freed from the drivenness that had plagued me most of my life. God had blessed me with the dream job serving at The Marriage Hub. And the final miracle in this year of healing was for our house in Lancaster to sell at the exact time to the exact people for the exact price we needed to pay our debts and enter this time of our lives debt free. All of this healing came after years of loss, pain, uncertainty and suffering. I share this not to boast in my own blessings, but to acknowledge that Jesus was with me in the years of loss just as much as He is in these years of healing. Loss and gain happen to us in varying degrees, but Jesus’ love and presence never changes! This is the truth of John 16:33!

Jesus tells us to be cheerful in the face of tribulations. Why? Because He knows there is something we need to experience. He has overcome the world and all its tribulations, pain and chaos. Jesus is alive in you through His spirit, which means He will accomplish something special in the midst of what the world sees as tribulation and loss. Life this side of heaven is hard. I work in a marriage ministry that serves as the trauma center for marriages in crisis, troubled or just stuck. 85% of the time couples going through our program stay together, but that 15% that don’t break my heart. One woman said that she came to the retreat with hope, only to find out her husband was sexting a girl while they were at the retreat. People we love hurt us, they get sick and leave us, they get angry and fire us, and they get married and ignore us. Friends change over the years and disappoint us relationally. This world will never live up to the expectations we have for it. Tribulations can be counted on, and the overcomer can also be counted on. Remember the holy moments in your life. Memorialize them. Celebrate them annually. Build a memorial to them. Choose to see the good times mixed up with the bad ones. Jesus brings light, healing, peace, and power to overcome and suffer well. Our hope is NOT in this world, our culture, our profession, family or friends. They are all under the same curse, the same chaos, and the same tribulations. Jesus is the friend who never leaves, the father who never disappoints, the brother who always shows up, the lover who never hurts. Rest in His presence and remember the Holy moments well. You will need them again soon.